2.13.2008

a new life...

OMG i dont know whats my mood today.. but definetly im positively O.K! okai then whatever & this day.. is the day...so anyways who cares?! harhar... finally 4th mastery test is OVER! few more weeks till our vacation... & to tell you that im not that excited coz we aint going to philippines as what ive expected! damn it! i hate my life..

anyways.. 1 more year than we would be going to our separate ways now.. & i might as well enjoy every minute i have with my friends coz out there its a whole new world, challenges and pop quizzes we can look after... just want my friends to know that thanks for being here for me when things go wrong, thank you for all what youve dont for me.. & i will miss those years the happy ones & the bad ones... whatever it doesnt make any difference its still the moments that i wont forget...

ill try to forget all those bad moments, those embarrasing ones, get a hold of myself and start a new journey...





i dedicate this song to all my closefriends out there espcially my bestfriend


"True Friend"

[VERSE 1]
We sign our cards and letters BFF
You've got a million ways to make me laugh
You're lookin' out for me; you've got my back
It's so good to have you around
You know the secrets
I could never tell
And when I'm quiet you break through my shell
Don't feel the need to do a rebel yell
Cause you keep my feet on the ground

[CHORUS 1]
You're a true friend
You're here till the end
You pull me aside
When something ain't right
Talk with me now and into the night
'Til it's alright again
You're a true friend

[VERSE 2]
You don't get angry when I change the plans
Somehow you're never out of second chances
Won't say "I told you" when I'm wrong again
I'm so lucky that I've found

[CHORUS 2]
A true friendYou're here till the end
You pull me aside
When something ain't right
Talk with me now and into the night
'Til it's alright again

[BRIDGE]
True friends will go to the end of the earth
Till they find the thing you need
Friends hang on through the ups and the downs
Cause they've got someone to believe in

[CHORUS 3]
A true friend
You're here till the end
You pull me aside
When something ain't right
Talk with me now and into the night
No need to pretend
You're a true friend
You're here till the end
Pull me aside
When something ain't right
Talk with me now and into the night
'Til it's alright again
You're a true friend [3x]
just want my friends to know that
"Im still someone who cares"

PS: i dont quite like the voice of HANNAH MONTANA.. i just like the message of this song
harharhar... theres no group picture taking today... good thing i didnt dress up ..

WATCH THIS!


haha.. bisaya people out there!! watch this! sooo damn HILAROUS! i almost fall off my chair watching this video!! ROFLMAO.. my tummys about to explode. ive watch this many times already like about 10x this day haha.. this is a bisaya dobing thingy...dunno wats called.. but! please watch then comment me what you think.. if you dont understand bisaya then dont mind watching this coz you wont undertand a thing.

haha.. this completely made my DAY!



2.12.2008

i miss them...

hi

first of all. tomorrow will be another day full of excitments and tests. i should be studying now and focus on the test and look what im doing now.. im blogging!!! damn it! haha... oh well.. this will only be a short entry...

i have another blog here in blogspot BUT wont tell coz its very private, i will only tell that url site if your my friend whom i can trust on and whatever... youll be very lucky if you have the chance to read my private blog & reading my mind like an open book..

i have blog account in livejournal.. just testing it out if its better than blogger.. but ive realize now that blogger is much more easy to use but limited features.. what i like about live journal is that they have awesome features & so much more.. pls visit this site.. kyuusho's livejournal

i sooo miss my life in the philippines even though im not expressing it or my face cant tell... i miss my friends,miss my former classmates, i miss my relatives, i miss my home,my dog, my bike, and i miss my school!!!!!!

if i could turn back the time i would pick to be in the philippines forever..my life is a living hell in here!!!!! but i manage to cope with the challenges.. but still i miss `em sooo much

i was scanning at my bestfriend's profile (isadora) and see lot of pictures from my past, lot of events ive missed.... tear flow down my cheeks...tried to stop it but theres nothing left i can do..god chooses me to be here & i know theres a reason...

this ends here.... gotta sleep before studying okay.. goodbye and farewells..

2.10.2008

what a dreadful day...

hello.. its been a dreadful day and ive been such a mess lately craming for this stupid project that ive been working all day and night arghh! just die you TERRIBLE OLD HAG!.. and.. i got this problem somehow i want to take back what i was saying at my last post.. i just didnt expect this as the saying goes "expect the unexpected!" damn that saying! & anyways i trust her thats why i didnt remind her of that... haizzz.... i know that i didnt say those words so dont expect me to believe.. but anyways i understand .. haha.. i just felt bad.. so entirely im not mad or angry at her.. i just felt bad for myself ... i was like this of all my 15 years of teenage life its my first time to ask someone a favor.. ive been doing a lot of favors from other people but i dont mind but dont ABUSED it okay?! i can tell if your abusing me and flooding me with lots and lots of favors...and anyways eventually i stop emoting and get a hold of myself haha.. i just thank tasneem for being such a great friend.. i know ive been such a pain in the neck .. erms.. ive just noticed right now that ive kept using the words "well" and "anyways" arghh... ill cross that out of my dictionary.. except for if i really need to use it.. haha



DAMN IT! the day after tomorrow is gonna be our 4th mastery test and i havent studied a single book yet!! tomorrow ill be going on hiatus mode and will come back blogging after mastery test... i will just take a quick peek at my friendster to see who comments and reply them all if someone leave a note...

oh! wanna share to you some poem i found at deviant..

Not The Same Person.

You think you know someone when really you don’t
I’ve tried so hard to help her but now I just cant cope

Why she is pushing me away I really don’t know
She pushes me any harder and I think I just might go

I’ve tried my best to help her but I guess that’s not enough
She is making my life hell and our friendship so tough

People tell me I should leave her, she has hurt me way too much
But if you where in my shoes you wouldn’t be saying things as such

She is fragile and broken, abandoned and bruised
Vulnerable and delicate but there is nothing left I can do

Her lies like liquid fire they spray me and they burn
I hope in years to come that maybe she will just learn

There is not much more I can do she has drained me emotionally
She has hurt me in every way possible mentally and totally

She always says she is sorry and that she needs me greatly
If so…why has she been so bitterly selfish lately?

But now lately has turned into all the time
Why is she so found of breaking this little heart of mine?

I’m sick of forgiving her just to get hurt taking her back
I’ve got to let her go and get my life back on track

I thought we’d be best friends forever but I guess that’s not the case
But who stays best friends forever and ever anyways?

We used to be best friends and we used to be so close
But now its come to and end and that’s what hurts the most

I need to understand and I need to let her go
I need to understand she isn’t the same person I used to know.

2.08.2008

another tough day & the moments i cant forget

hello

okaii.. let talk about what happened yesterday that made me look like this me and some of my friends been chatting all night long.. and oh yeah! at that time i was a little busy doing my project in MAPEH.. and searching some videos about cancer,tumors and stuffs like that.. i was having a hard time downloading the videos because my softwares and files are all incomplete i dont have any FLV player which can play a youtube video when downloaded, still no Nero Buring rom...

last time my computer got bugged and it freeze my computer.. then dad fixed it and good thing its back to normal.. whan its finally fixed my dad install all the softwares that needed to be installed but there are some softwares that arent installed yet like what i was sayin at my 1st paragraph and some of my files are missing...

i was crying my head off that night coz i really dont know what to do... the heak i dont have any downloading softwares like torrent, limewire, bearshare or even youtube gabbler... haizz.. its so hard.. when i finally have the guts to ask someone to help me good thing clarrence is there so save me from this mess and help me download those videos.. i was so touched and didnt expected that she would do that for me.. at that time i was relieved and i wasnt stressed no more and have the mood to chat with othere people and then this begins of an endless conference and chatness from my friends thats why i ended up sleeping at almost 1 am..


have you seen this pic?



have you ever felt to be ignored,battered out, deserted and nobody whats do be with you? well.. for me i felt that feeling last time ..i was have this emotional thing that really distracts me and i need to let it out thats why i told it to my bhessi and then that was it.. haha.. oh yeah... i posted this message at my yahoo messenger status

i thought you were authentic..but now i realize that your just a big fake


oh yeah! like i said.. i did post that message... and you know what.. many people actually reacted and PM me saying "am i the one your talking about... if im the one.. pls tell me and im sorry" i was a little shocked and did expect that it would happened like that...and some asked "who is the one your talking about in your status message?" i did my best to tell the truth but not all i replied the whole meaning of my message some of them i only told them half of what im saying' while some was the whole truth.. i did told the trught to Diane i told her what i was sayin' and who i was talking about coz i know she can keep a secret haha.. i just hope she wont break it.. here we go again.. i just promised myself to forget this and that and all of those nonsense but it just keep crawling in and wont come out... oh well... this time i wont be saying and talking about that anymore.. i feel i want to..... the truth is i was a little confound that i want to brazen out of what i really want to make it clear.. but today.. it came to me that i should just forget about it and move on... i was a little distracted about those stuffs and feel a little awkward... i guess i should stop this and get myself some snacks

i guess ive realized time fly so fast you are not even watching were your going and often make silly mistakes...

2.07.2008

so what-ever

im so tired today because of that stupid project...

Another day, another strenuous evening in front of the computer screen. I'm going head over heels just to make the ends meet and its driving me absolutely bonkers. ive aldready created emerald her blog & pls do visit
im-always-alone .. arghhhhh i cant fix my blog... damn it!

dang! im so stuffed! my mom & dad ordered KFC and pizza hut at the same time.. and the point is we already have our dinner.. im sooo stuffed .. and also sleepy.. & oh! only 4 weeks more till the flight of tasneem to philippines.. im really gonna miss her much, huhuhu.. why is that all of my bestfriends seems to go to there separate ways leaving me alone in this deserted place, my first bestfriend was still in phil,my second bestfriend, she migrate to canada from the kingdom & i miss her truckloads all those moments i just cant forget.. then my third bestfriend shes going home to philippines & my forth bestfriend left me behind... oh whos the fifth then... im just too tired to socialize with other people right now...

next week would be our 4th MASTERY TEST! gosh.. how time flies so fast.. and i still ******* cant be viewed for my eyes only! haha

2.06.2008

im a busy bee...

dont feel like going to school tomorrow.. how i wish i would catch a cold or something... it that way you would know who your true friends are that care about you.. but! ill still go to school . then sleep there

damn it! i got so much to do.. im so busy yet i have time here to write down what im doing and blahblah! anyways.. heres a list of what i should do today for only 3 hours and 22 mins.

things should do:

1. write new blog post (like what im doing now)
2. do project/reporting in MAPEH
3. check Friendster of isabel
- Change her primary pic
- Put "beautiful days" embed in her profile
- visit "mali/js" profile for her
4. Fix the alighnment problems in my blogger
5. Create emerald an account in blogger

damn it! look at that! so many projects and favors to do.i feel like my eyebags are popping out of my face o m gosh! i need a break.. oh well.. today im being so generous and helpful what the heck is wrong with me?! haha.. i treat Tasneem chicken worth of SR 2 and Cla's lollipop worth of SR 1 and my lunch money is only SR 10. today i didnt have any savings money!!! arghhhhh!! i need to buy something.. but starting from tomorrow no more Miss generous girl coz ill start saving for me to buy that thing...

oh well.. look at my eyes right now.. so big.. i think?! i need coffee damn it!

ive saw something that really turned me on & made me laugh at the same time.. and guess what?! i wont tell haha.. ..next topic

WHAT HAPPENED AT SCHOOL

History time - coz Sir A. is late 20 mins.
oh yeah.. me and isay-san laugh our heads out.. i think it all started when i said something that made her laugh.. and at first i really dont get it.. then when i think about what i just said it made me laugh also.. isay's face is all red as a tomatoes and she had tears of joy haha.. or should i say tears of laughness.. and then again. me?? im jumping up & down.. but not entirely jumping haha.. i would look like a clown by that.. haha..

uhmmm... i have this survey that i got from friendster then i let is answer to some of my friends and we all have a got laugh..if you think its corny then dont read it rather then making a fuss here and saying how corny it its..


Name 7 people you can thinkof,right on top of your head.Don'tread the questions below until youwrite the names.This is a lot funnierif you randomly list the names. No Cheating!!!
*Follow your instinct.List down theonesthat came RIGHT out of your mind.^^*

1. lorraine
2. tasneem
3. laila
4. imee
5. isabel
6. diane
7. Clarrence

Don't Go Ahead Unless You Filled UpThe Top! And Don't Go Back And ChangeAny Names!

How did you meet number 4?
= at school hehe^^
What would u do if 1 and 2 were going out ?
= omgggoshhh.. that cant be possible
Where did you meet 3?
= at school since 1st yr
What do you think of number 5?
= shes funny ^^ and fun to be with
What would you do if no. 1confessed that she/he loves you?
= goshness!! thats overdue dude.. shes my bestfriend
Do you miss number 4?
= oh d hell i see her everyday at school O.o
What do you think of number 2?
= we almost have everything in common^^
What do you think number 3 is doing right now?
= doing her projects and homework.. i guess..
What do you think of number 4?
= uhhhh.,.. funny?
Who does number 1 stay with?
= with parents
Have you ever been inside 2's house?
= oh yeah.. many times already
Do you know no. 7 deepest secrets?
= oh yeah
Have you ever kissed no. 6?
= WTF?! hell no!
Do you hate no. 1?
= nah.. shes my bestfriend how could i possibly hate her^^
Do you think no.4 & no. 5 like each other?
= oh yeah.. as a friend
Do you love no. 6?
= of corz^^ as a friend
Have you seen no.5 got angry?
= uhmmm yah
Do you think no.3 hates you?
= i guess...
What would you feel if no.2 & no.4 are making-out?
= oh the hell.. i wont stop them.. haha joke.. positively that isnt possible!
Describe no.7?
= shes malambing and always smiling and happy all the time but sometimes shes pretty annoying
Does no.4 know all of you secrets?
= nope.. not one secret
Do you love being with no.1?
= oh yeah.. i miss my best friend^^
Have you caught no.6 lyring?
= nope not yet.. and on the look out haha
Do you know no.2's real personality?
= oh yeah.. i think i already know her by now


i tag everyone whos hasnt answered this yet !

2.05.2008

worst day of my life

this is the worst day of my life & the most embarrssing day!

arghhh... dont feel like im gonna type here.. its so so so humiliating (100000x)

however ill let you see this RANDOM smile'es animations i got from a site.. it really made me laugh and touched at the same time...



this really made me laugh coz i remember one time that someone did this to me and i was like "Oh! come on get serious.. QUIT IT" pretty damn annoying but its okai... haha


this would be my reaction if i would see a ghost!!


awwwww... this is so TOUCHING... true friendship.. thats what friends are for.


haha.. this made me laugh like hell.. i wanna do this to *too confidential to see* haha.. coz sometimes shes annoying with her mouth open and blah blah! she just wont stop... but oh well.. im not human btw if i did that.. otherewise i would be worser than an animal


i miss you...


thats me and my friends..


talk - ear - see

2.04.2008

i lose.. !

arghh... the game i said yesterday didnt turned out good.. in fact ive talked already so much souls.. because if i didnt talk H-S said if i was crying.. in fact im not.. haiiz who cares about that stupid game anyways.. haiiz.. tomorrow its our turn now to make candy.. our is "chocholate apple candy...blahblah.." forgot the name already.. omg i have such low brain...

arghh.. lately ive discovered something.. but i didnt get mad.. like DUH! who cares about it anyways.. ive suffered enough.. people just didnt use there brains before they do anything or they really wanna do it but there conscience cant take it so they go back and start a new road to walk too...

Emerald now is requesting that i will make her an account here in blogger and edit her layout.. okaii.. thats no biggie with me.. but ill do it tomorrow

i feel so SLACK !

2.03.2008

the lames day i every had...



this is the lamest day i ever had...

tasneem didnt go to school today since her lil bro is sick..& tomorrow she'll be absent again.. dang! i dunno who i will talk to.. not a single soul is seen beside me except my bag & my envelope.. imagine a table without a chair.. i dont know who i will talk to im so bored that i was like talking to myself looking left and right and then bam! i was like going insane.... im talking to myself i was like "hmmmm.. what should i do with this?!" and many more... it just that i need someone to talk to... its just that the only people i trust is taz & lorraine.... and im comfortamble talking with them...it just that i find it hard to trust people... dang! this life.. oh the hell with this.. why am i always saying "dang" should i say "damn" instead?? dang dang dang... what figures.. damn damn damn.. haha..

i was there sitting all alone at my seat then blah blah blah! dunno what to do... haizz.i feel the world crashing down on me... i try to socialize with other people but im getting tried of it already since they dont mind me also.. then just go up to me then talk to me if they need help.. i feel im so USED! the hell with this life... am i in a nightmare or what?! why am i being so EMOTIONAL here.. i guess i just want to say what i want since nobodies been listening to me..except this blog.. just listening but no reply.. the hell with blogger it doesnt even have a soul..

ARGHH.... i should probably live life to the fullest when i still have the chance.. but how can i live a life when i dont even know WHAT THE HELL IM TALKING ABOUT HERE!

truth is.... i dont know what the hell im doing..

okai... get serious... sometimes theres a time that i want to be alone.. mezmerize and all .. find mself.. and wonder what would happen to me next... should this be my last day? or is it not?
oh thats easy.. i dunno.. who cares

wahhhhhh... WHAT WILL I DO TOMORROW!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

THERES NOTHING TO DO..... I DONT HAVE ANYONE TO TALK TO... and ALL...

im going to play games here... for a single day and thats tomorrow " IM NOT GOING TO TALK TO A SINGLE SOUL" just today haha.. lets just see if i can do it & see what happens..

yah know what.. my room is a total mess of disaster you cant tell it by just looking you way it.. probably you might mistaken it by some kinda forest haha.. im so lazy right now to tidy up my room..

behind the smile & laughter is the girl you'll never know...

2.01.2008

McDo days


hi yo!

its been 3 days since my last post.. haiiz.. so much to tell.. lets begin..

JANUARY 30, 2008

its the day of all the top 10 students to go on stage and grab of what they deserve of all the hardwork they had done.. top 1 was Paul Bidol..(as usual) Top 2 was Johanna Eledia congrats to her!! hehe.. then johanne treat us all to Mcdo and let us pick what we want.. i was a lil bit a withdrawn since its really you kner.. thats why i just said i want: Mcflurry and frech fries and tasneem: only an apple pie.. then so is clarrence and imee also same order as mine..

many people also got absent that day like: Ghadis, Laila, aicee, Fatima & khristine..

i know some of them dont want to go to school coz they feel not going to.. and thinking that there isnt any classes and such.. but who cares anyways..

convocation was held after recess.. i will tell you what happend before recess.. a time that i cant forget, a time where my blood rise at the top of my unused brain.. dang! i just cant forget.. i wont mention names anyways..

me and Tasneem silently just minding our own bussiness at our respective seats then M.A entered the classroom and announced there isnt any practice held.. since the gym was used by the grade schoolers and prep. for the convocation.. all made a fuss coz about this and that.. then suddenly someone like M say something that made T & I insulted i really what to slap her and tape her mouth since shes going to far and too INSENSITIVE.. like what johnathan says on his blog that "you dont need to insult people just to make them laugh" but dang.. people here arent using there brains and doesnt watch out what they were sayin' .. if they are doing that again.. i will really tell them directly that they are hurting someones feelings .. i just want them to know that even if i dont make a sound when they insult doesnt mean that its okay for me to be insulted and so is T.. but now im just giving them a chance.. im not the type of person that you can do whatever you want with me.. i dont like to be USED!! im so through with all there #@!*.. so through being the butt of all the jokes being the butt of all there laughs.. but if they make one more insult to T & I , there gonna get a piece of something.. i just want them to know that im not too SENSITIVE and i just want them to know that when make those they should know there limits.. i just hate being USED!!! so so through with it... cuz like now.. i feel like im used... but i actually dont care since im used so much its already part of me and my life..why just cant people stop being like that so much using him or her then set them aside coz he/she already gets what he/she wants.. in fact im a fine judge of character by looking at them and there actions..

okay..im calm.. got to go.. bye people..